I'm Not Going Anywhere
by SherriPoloTP
Summary: Stef starts having feelings and instincts that Lena is no longer attracted to her. Two- Shot
1. Chapter 1

**SO THIS IDEA HAS BEEN STUCK IN MY HEAD FOR AGES, THIS HAPPENS BEFORE STEF GETS HER IMPLANTS. SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS QUICK LITTLE TWO SHOT.**

STEF

 _As I kissed up and down my wife's stomach licking and kissing every inch, I started at her breast then her stomach I couldn't get enough of her taste in my mouth she tasted so good. I kissed down to her trimmed mound and I lifted her legs to wrap around my shoulders but when I looked up at her she was crying and she had a look on her face._

" _Love what's wrong," I asked her stopping what I was doing so I could see her face. She did not answer me but she kept on crying._

 _I dropped her legs from around my shoulder and I went to go lay on the side of her. I grabbed her hand and kissed it._

" _Sweetheart talk to me, what's wrong," I asked my wife but instead of her answering me she dropped my hand from hers and she covered her eyes with her hands and sobbed more._

" _Lena, your scaring me, talk to me please baby."_

" _Stef I... I umm... I don't know how to say this," Lena said crying harder now not looking me in the face._

" _Say what, come on talk to me," I asked her again. But she just kept on crying._

" _I mean was I not pleasing you right, if so I can try again," I said reaching my hands to go down in between her legs, but she quickly grabbed my hands to stop me. I knew my face turned into a frown._

" _Lena can you..."_

" _I don't want to have sex with you anymore Stef," she said to me staring up at the ceiling but with her eyes closed._

" _What," I asked her making sure I heard her right._

" _I don't want to have sex with you anymore, I'm not attracted to you anymore," she said crying harder now._

" _Lena, baby what, why are you not attracted to me anymore," I asked her and she looked at me then her eyes immediately went to my chest area. I looked down at my scared chest and I crossed my arms over them..._

I jumped in my sleep and my heart was beating. And I had tears running down my face.

I turned around and looked at Lena and she sound asleep with her arms folded under her head and she looked so beautiful, how can someone look like an angel in her sleep.

I immediately looked down at my chest and I Iifted up my tank top and they were still bandaged up just like how I did it before I went to sleep.

It was just a dream I kept saying over and over again. But for some reason it didn't feel like a dream. And I looked over at my wife still sleeping. And I couldn't help the tears as they started to fall down my face.

I heard the alarm go off and I got a little irritated because I only got a few hours of sleep due to my dream/ nightmare last night. I turned around and Lena was already up I heard the shower running. Since I was still on medical leave, I went downstairs to start breakfast and start the coffee for myself and Lena. As I was starting the coffee pot I couldn't keep the images of my dream out of my mind. I knew it was just a dream, but for some reason it seemed so real to me. Was Lena really not attracted to me anymore. She has seen my scar already because she helped me change my bandages. But the thought of Lena not being attracted to me was so baffling. I really didn't know where these thoughts were coming from, we haven't even had sex yet since my surgery.

As I poured my cup of coffee and laid out bagels and fruit for breakfast, my mind was just on that damn dream.

I heard someone coming down from the steps and once the heels hit the hardwood floor, I knew it had to be Lena or Mariana.

"Goodmorning babe," Lena said to me coming to me smiling.

Lena looked absolutely beautiful coming in the kitchen. She had on a pink colored blouse with a black pencil skirt and a matching black belt that was around her waist. And some black pumps and her bushy curly hair hung down her back. She was so stunning. But for some reason I kept thinking why would this beautiful lady want me out of all people. I couldn't help but feel this lump in my throat.

Lena came over to me give me a kiss but I turned my head so she could only could kiss my cheek. She gave me a look and I avoided looking at her all together.

"Everything okay babe, she asked me.

I just couldn't stay down here and look at her without breaking down.

"Um, I'm not feeling well, I'm going to go back and lay down, kiss the kids goodbye for me. I said getting up from the table and rushing upstairs as fast as I could before Lena had the chance to say anything. I closed the door to the bedroom and laid down on my side of the bed and just cried more tears.

I must have feel asleep while crying because I felt somebody shift on the bed. When I looked over my shoulders it was Lena and she was rubbing my arm up in down in smooth motions.

"Hey are you feeling alright," Lena asked me with concern and worry in her voice and I could see it in her eyes as well.

"What time is it," I asked and I looked and it was 11:30 in the afternoon. "Lena what are you doing here so early.

"I'm on lunch break, I wanted to come and check on you. You was acting strange this morning," she asked me but I didn't want to tell her the truth.

"I was just tired, I couldn't sleep last night," I told her which was the truth.

"OK, and what else is bothering you," she asked me.

"Nothing Lena, I was tired and just wanted to lay down."

"Stef, please don't shut me out, What is going on in that pretty head of yours," she said to me rubbing her hands on my head.

"Don't say things you don't mean Lena," I said to her.

"What," she asked me a look of confusing look.

"You calling me pretty, don't say things you don't mean.

"Stef, what are you talking about."

I just looked away from her because I really did not feel like crying again.

"Stef look at me please," she said to me. I still wasn't budging to look at my wife. "Stef."

 **HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE FIRST PART. SECOND PART WILL BE UP SOON. SO PLEASE REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK.**

 ***NOT EDITED* :/ WILL EDIT LATER ON.**


	2. Chapter 2

**SORRY ABOUT THE WAIT DIDN'T HAVE THE MUSE TO WRITE. BUT HERE IS THE LAST CHAPTER.**

 _PREVIOUSLY_

" _Stef what are you talking about."_

 _I just looked away from her because I really did not feel like crying again._

" _Stef look at me please," she said to me. I still wasn't budging to look at me my wife._

" _Stef."_

STEF

For some reason I could not muster up the courage to talk to my wife. It just hurt too badly. I know Lena and I made a vow to each other not too long ago to stop keeping secrets from each other because it was taking a huge drift in our relationship about our lack of communication.

"Stef you promised me you wouldn't keep any secrets from me or hold anything back," Lena said rubbing up and down my back. "Now you were fine before you went to bed last night. What happened last night?"

I turned my body so I could look at Lena. And she had a look of concern on her face and I saw nothing but love in her eyes and a little bit of worry.

I just looked at the love of my life and I knew I owed it to her to tell her what was going on with me.

"Umm it's just… umm last night… I um had a bad dream"

"Okay about what sweetheart," she asked me and she grabbed my hand and linked her long fingers into mines.

"Well um, we was about to have sex, I was caressing you and stuff and I looked up at you and you was crying so I asked what was wrong you said you wasn't attracted to me anymore and you didn't want to make love to me anymore. I asked why and you just looked down at my chest and started crying," I explained to my wife with silent tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Oh sweetheart," Lena said getting up on the bed and positioning herself so she could hold me and look me in the eyes. "That will never happen in a million years never, don't you remember what I said to you before you had the surgery that what you have is so much more than your body. And I meant every word that I said. You are so beautiful and so sexy to me. You can lose all of your limbs and that will never stop me from loving you. I wish you will just believe me because you are breaking my heart."

"Lena, you say that now, but we haven't had sex at all yet since my surgery. All you have seen is a glimpse of my flat chest every time you help me change.

"Stef since when has your breast became a big part of our sex life," Lena asked me and she had a smirk on her face.

"Well I mean every time we have sex you are ripping off my bra and my breast becomes a lollipop for about 10 minutes," I said to her and I couldn't help the chuckle that came out of my mouth.

"I mean what are you going to do now I asked her."

"Stef, just FYI there are other things for me to suck on," and I looked at her I started to blush softly.

"I know but we are lesbians Lena, we like boobs and you have been all over mines for 10 years."

"Sweetheart, I have seen your boobs so many times it is enough to last me a lifetime. I will be fine. And your vagina or that nice ass of yours has not gone anywhere so I will still be satisfied and still very much turned on when we make love."

I just looked at her as she rubbed my hand that were still intertwined with hers.

"Honey that dream you had was just your negative conscious. Nothing has changed that has made me not love you any less. I love every piece of you okay, implants flat chest or not, you have me until either one of us goes 6 feet under. I'm not going anywhere," I just looked at her as tears started to fall down my eyes.

"I love you so much Lena, I can't imagine my life without you in it, just please don't leave me," I said to Lena as she just held me while I cried.

"I'm not baby, never, I love you," she said grabbing my face as she kissed with so much passion in her lips.

Stef

As I was cleaning up after dinner, all the kids scattered after the chores were done and Lena went upstairs because she was complaining that her stomach was bothering her. I cleaned up the rest of dinner and locked up downstairs and I headed upstairs. The door to the bathroom was closed.

"Lena you ok sweetheart," I asked my wife knocking on the door to our bathroom.

"Yea love, I will be out in a minute." 

While she was in the bathroom I went to change into my pajamas. I undressed the bed for us so we can just lay down I just wanted to hold my wife tonight because I needed to be near her.

I heard the bathroom door open and Lena walked out with a pink and blue lingerie set on. The bra was cut low and showed off her small perky breast the underwear she was wearing was a thong but it covered half of her ass cheeks and it was enough to have my insides go wild. My wife was just so sexy.

"Wow," was all I could say at the moment.

"Come to bed baby, just take those pajamas off while before you do, and take all of it off,"

I started shaking for a moment because I didn't want to get completely naked in front of her. I believed what she said earlier and plenty of times before that she was still attracted to me, I just had a hard time taking it all in.

"Stef it is okay baby, it is just me here," she said to me and I looked at her and just nodded and exhaled. I pulled my top over my head and stepped out of my pants and I was completely naked in front of my wife. And she just smiled at me.

"You are so beautiful baby," she said to me grabbing my hands and grabbing me so our bodies was touching and we started to kiss passionately as our tongues spun around and out teeth clashed I couldn't help but want more.

She motioned our bodies to head towards the bed and she led me to the bed and climbed on top of me.

As she made love to me, it felt like it was our first time all over again. I could not feel anymore connected to her and in love with her than I already was.

 **SO THERE YOU GO. HOPE YOU LIKE IT. ANY SUGGESTIONS LET ME KNOW**


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